I Know A Secret
I'm pretty sure I said it before and I'm saying it again. Sure, timing relates, but if I want to have sex, I just have to be the instigator and the agressor. This morning when we woke up (after having an odd dream about being away for a weekend and having a sex dream as a prelude to sex) I gave my guy a full body massage, stripping and licking him along the way. After a while we were BOTH ready and it was yummy.
Here's the thing - it gets me JUST as hot to do those things to him, turning him on as it does for him to do those things to me. But, I WANT him to do those things to me. But, I want to have sex. I have the power to have sex and to get HOT, I just have to be the one doing the work. So, I guess the question is why do I want to resist doing the work on principle when the outcome really is the same AND what I want!?! Giving him a blow job makes ME wet! So, whats my problem? Quit my bitching, do some work, get really turned on, and get off. Prolem solved, right?
I'm going to try this. I do have to admit that this plan may work better for women wanting sex than for men wanting sex. I'm going to try it and see if my sex life improves. If it does and we're having fun, then the next step would then be to nudge him into taking a starring role once in a while. I'll keep you posted, as usual.
Here's the thing - it gets me JUST as hot to do those things to him, turning him on as it does for him to do those things to me. But, I WANT him to do those things to me. But, I want to have sex. I have the power to have sex and to get HOT, I just have to be the one doing the work. So, I guess the question is why do I want to resist doing the work on principle when the outcome really is the same AND what I want!?! Giving him a blow job makes ME wet! So, whats my problem? Quit my bitching, do some work, get really turned on, and get off. Prolem solved, right?
I'm going to try this. I do have to admit that this plan may work better for women wanting sex than for men wanting sex. I'm going to try it and see if my sex life improves. If it does and we're having fun, then the next step would then be to nudge him into taking a starring role once in a while. I'll keep you posted, as usual.
posted by Married Girl at 11:36 PM
9 Comments:
You want to feel desired.
It starts to bear on your self esteem if you feel like you have to take everything you ever get.
Take it from someone who knows.
One possible reason is that in his eyes, you've evolved from a sex-object to an angel and you dont f*ck angels, If you know what I mean. I hope it all turns out well. Disclaimer : I know nothing.
WOW - I sure can relate to mouthy girls comment. *sigh*
Hurry and try it out - I can't wait to see how this goes!!!
Best of luck to you!
Yes, please let us know how this transpires. : )
Oh you say so much here,where to even begin my commentary.
I am recently back together with my ex-husband after 17 years of seperation.
Of course we are older, but the frequecy of the sex is definetly not what I would like,nor what I expected, but I still enjoy the time we do have together.
The trouble I sometimes have with being the initiator is that I can rejected, and that's a drag.
There are so many elements in the game of sex. All the baggage, all the hang-ups. It's really too bad, especially becuase it is such a magnificent way to show love.
Finally I say...
Sometimes your ship doesn't come in, so you have to row out to it.
So, you go girl....
I too, am a woman with tons of sexual hunger, unlike the steriotype. I know what Debbie was saying, I hate being rejected tho I know husband loves me always. I do respect your decsion to keep intiating, and maybe later you can nudge him.. as you said. Have you come out and talked to him about how this makes you feel?
Please keep updating in posts, I would like to live vicariously...
Because you want to feel desired! It is a basic human need. It is probably the one thing that drives us humans to being unfaithful. Its far better when both parties share the instigating because then you both feel equally desired by one another.
Hugs
Des
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